Just suppose for a moment that you lived in Clacton and were now facing the prospect of a by-election, effectively called by Nigel Farage as a consequence of his resigning as an MP. None of the major political parties or Restore are fielding a candidate because the chance of another by-election if Nigel Farage were to win this contest is very high indeed. That is because, if he is returned to Parliament, it is thought to be highly likely that the Parliamentary Standards Office will exclude him from office because of the non-declaration of the donations and support he received prior to the 2024 general election.
So, what do you do now?
Do you abstain, like all the main parties, and give him a free run?
Or do you vote for the only alternative available to you, the most likely of whom will be Count Binface, a person who, like Screaming Lord Sutch of the Monster Raving Loony Party in the past, has made a habit of standing in by-elections in a way that most people find hard to understand, but who has, nonetheless, succeeded in bringing an element of humour to the process?
I admit that I would face a dilemma. Count Binface is not a serious candidate, and would not make a good MP, I suspect, although I note that when Hartlepool voted for the town's football mascot, who masqueraded as a monkey, to be its mayor, it turned out he did quite a good job.
That, though, would not be the reason for voting for Count Binface. As has been true in many recent elections, the choice of who to vote for on this occasion is determined by who you are opposing, and not by who you are supporting.
Would I vote for the Count precisely because defeating Farage would be a worthwhile objective, by excluding him from Parliament, potentially forever, whilst totally undermining his Reform Party? The temptation would be very strong.
I know that Count Binface is being given odds of 7 to 1 by Ladbrokes this morning. I suspect that they are understating his potential. His standard by-election offer, which is to build at least one social home in the constituency, arguing that this is one more than anybody else will achieve, might, I think, win the day on this occasion.
I am not underestimating the people of Clacton. I know that many of them will vote for Farage. But it is also possible that there will be significant opposition to him, and those who want to record that might vote for Count Binface. If so, we might get the strangest by-election result of my lifetime.
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Buy me a coffee!
I might buy some popcorn.
As the Monster Raving Loonies point out a number if their policies such as reducing the age of majority to 18 have been stolen by mainstream politicians, however I suggest that no Government will enforce the move of the hand drier in the Gents in the Crown & Treaty in Uxbridge to a more sensible position.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crown_and_Treaty
🙂
“Count Binface is not a serious candidate, and would not make a good MP”
The same could be said for Burnt-ham, a 1990s politico that will make a worse PM.
I’d vote for Binface, indeed, UK citizens should en-mass vote only for Binfaces until politicos get serious.
At the moment with some exceptions (lewis & co – I’m looking @ you) we only have political parrots wheeling out tired neolibtard claptrap – all of them, all of the time. They have no capacity for independent thought, they have no basic humanity (if they did, the Israeli embassy would now be closed).
Count Binface for MP, fart-rage out.
I would vote for Count Binface without a moment’s hesitation.
Farage has had an astonishing clear run for decades as far as media criticism is concerned, now he’s throwing a tantrum at being subject to entirely normal press scrutiny. The man who thinks he is untouchable needs to be taken down by more than just a peg or two.
I can see that there are serious implications attached to turning what should be a serious exercise of democracy into a farce, but just once in a while I think the ends justify the means. Complete electoral humiliation for Farage would not only destroy his credibility but also, I suspect, deter others from trying the same stunts.
I don’t think Binface would be any worse an MP than many we have suffered over the years….
“Would I vote for the Count precisely because defeating Farage would be a worthwhile objective, by excluding him from Parliament, potentially forever, whilst totally undermining his Reform Party? The temptation would be very strong.”
@Maggie Downie,
Me too! He might surprise everyone and do a good job or he will be voted out of office in three years at the next election. Either way, Count Binface is a vast improvement on Lord Farquaad as would be Woody Woodpecker. Even Wile E. Coyote would be a vast improvement.
I actually want to see Farage lose to Count Binface and then watch the rounds of the morning talk shows as he make appearances explaining his loss.Â
Me too
By all current indications the Count is a sensible thoughtful and thoroughly decent entity. His periodic visits to this galaxy are occasions of improved good humour and possibly even increased well being for we benighted earthlings.
A win in Clacton might well lead to other benificent aliens standing for political office, both here and in other troubled nations around the world. No more Farages, Badenochs, Johnsons or Trusses here. No more Trumps, Melonis, Mohdis, Putins, Netanyahus et al elsewhere.
It’s definitely worth seriously considering. We cant’t go on like this!!
Beyond the humour Count Binface has shown he is politically !iterate. He gloriously took down seasoned Sky political journalist Jon Craig during a Makerfield election interview.
H’Angus the Monkey – Hartlepool Football Club’s mascot – was elected as Hartlepool’s first directly elected mayor in 2002, narrowing beating Labour. Local MP Peter Mandelson famously went bananas. Former call centre worker Stuart Drummond turned out to be good at the job and was re-elected twice before finally standing down.
He did make mincemeat of Jon Craig, someone I knew well in 1977 when we co-edited the student union newspaper.
Here’s a link to the interview with Jon Craig. https://youtube.com/shorts/J11UiXgIgU4?si=vtboKFzUUUPOuLwz
We don’t just need the Count in Parliament, we need a Binface Party.
Binface’s previous pledge to make Piers Morgan zero emissions by 2030, was admirable, if unlikely to be achieved.
Farage or Binface? Â Binface all the way.
The man behind the mask is a successful comedian called Jon Harvey. He might make a decent MP.
https://www.jondharvey.com/
Assuming of course Farage is allowed play this pantomime game of parliamentary hokey cokey by resigning to stand again immediately if a by-election is called promptly.  But we don’t have to join this Farage farce, fiasco, fandango. He should simply scaramouche.
@Andrew,
Now let me think….When was it I last heard of some TV comedian becoming a politician? Some foreign bloke with an unspellable name?
Yes, that’s him! Volodymyr Zelenskyy.
As I understand it, he studied classics at Oxford. Like a recent prime minister, also something of a comedian.
I’m not sure if that would be seen as a pro or a con by the voters of Clacton, compared to Dulwich College and a career as a city trader and then several decades as a full time politician, including over 20 years on the MEP gravy train.  They (and the voters of Harwich before them) seem to like their Tory boys from private schools – like all the previous MPs since the war (apart from a brief Labour interlude from 1997 to 2005) – Dulwich, Forest School, Charterhouse, Winchester, Tonbridge, City of London.
It’s a great scenario if you don’t like Farage. If he wins, then he can’t claim to have beaten the establishment, because compared to Count Binface he is the establishment.
And if he loses… Well, that would say it all about what people really think of Farage and his policies.
I don’t think Binface will win, but I rather hope he does. He with, I suspect, stir things up a little and do something interesting. If nothing else, it would be a wake-up call to more serious politicians not to be complacent about the will of the people.
Do not assume Count Binface would not make a good MP. On the occasions I have heard him speak and answer media questions he has been erudite, witty and made a number of astute observations. With a few tweaks to his manifesto he stands an excellent chance. If I lived in the constituency I would vote for him. I hope he launches a vigorous social media campaign and puts Farage, a man who has consistently and outrageously abused his position as MP to make money, in a bin where he belongs.
I would definitely vote for Count Binface in Clacton. He is the ideal protest candidate.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Count_Binface
He collected 24,000+ votes in 2 London Mayoral Elections.
I’m looking forward to his Clacton 2026 Manifesto.
Fa***e has truly put himself into a lose-LOSE situation, whatever the result. My favoured result is a Farage win so that the investigations can re-open, but for Binface to get his highest vote share yet in a parliamentary by-election (anything over 308 which is what he got against Rishi Sunak in 2024).
“Make Politics Fun Again”
Stockmarket tip – buy shares in Clacton hotels and B&Bs.
Clacton constituents will, at long last, get a visit from their MP (and his security team, who must at least be up to battalion strength by now).
I suspect everything about this by-election will be a surprise. May it be peaceful.
Big questions – will Count Binface make it to Laura K’s Sunday morning spot, or be interviewed by Nick Robinson, or Robert Peston, under impartiality rules? Can he host his own show on GB News?
How long does one have to be resident in a constituency to be entitled to vote? Can one use a temporary address?  Just wonderng……..
I can think of nothing that would be seen as a turning point for hope in UK politics than the election of Count Binface. Reform would be as thoroughly ridiculed as Nigel himself and every effort must be made to encourage the voters of Clacton to go out and vote.
Yes, I would vote for the Count, in what might be a two horse race. And I would say to all those that oppose Reform in Clacton, get out and vote for Binface.
For one reason alone — the humiliation of Farage if his political career were to be ended by Count Binface.
The best humiliation of all for a man so full of his own self-importance.
Vote for Binface, and send the politics of Farage to where it belongs — the bin.
Wasn’t Zelensky a comedian in a former life?
Yes
One never knows where dormant talent may dwell.
It is high time we find out!
Delighted to see lots of donations going to Count Binface for his campaign!!
https://ko-fi.com/countbinface
If the Westminster administrative wheels grind slowly and other parties campaign for CB, this could be the end of Farage….
I’ve just listened to Count Binface on radio 4 today program (8:54 if anyone wants to catch it on BBC Sounds). He’s a genuinely funny man, which I often find is a clear sign of intelligence lacking in most politicians. As much as I would very much take up his offer of “Not being Nigel Farage”, I also wouldn’t be surprised if when he get’s elected, he’d make a very good MP. And I don’t say that in a “well all the MPs are useless, so he can’t be any worse” way, but due to the fact I suspect he’s a very intelligent, thoughtful man, that could do a decent job.
He can’t be worse than most of what we have
Even if no one votes for him the Count has done his job. If Farage wins because his only opponent was a man with a bin on his head then whatever he was trying to do by resigning is rendered a joke. Well played.
If I had a vote in Clacton I would vote Binface unless a Martin Bell-type candidate came forward. Some names bandied around include Martin Lewis and Carol Vorderman. Personally I would love to see Danny Dyer put himself forward. His comment about Cameron was classic as was his observation on welfare claimants i.e. it’s not the claimants who are scrounging but the employers who refuse to pay a realistic wage as they are the real ones scrounging off the system.
Much to agree with
Some interesting comments form some in the media this morning about Fa-rage’s decision to resign his seat. Turns out that the Government, specifically the Chancellor, has to agree to this and has it within it’s powers to refuse.
From Ed Davey on R4 via the Graun this morning: “If you want to resign as an MP, you actually have to apply to the government to have an appointment to an office. And the chancellor actually decides whether to appoint you. Now, normally that has happened.
However, there is a precedent going back to 1842 where the chancellor has didn’t appoint someone to one of these positions [steward of the Chiltern Hundreds]. And if that appointment is not made, then Mr Farage can’t resign and the investigation will continue.”
Interesting if his bluff was called, LMFA off!
That would be fun.
Could Count Binface be appointed???
I would roll on the floor laughing if that happened!!!!!
I think win, rather than be appointed.
Could he win – yes
I got Binface at 7.4, so I put the ÂŁ20 I got from betting ÂŁ1 Badenoch would win the Tory leadership contest. So yeah, I think he’ll win. That said, if you’ve listened to Count Binface, he’s a polically savvy satirist, and they can make excellent MPs.
Binface v Binfire
Ha ! Yes it would be very entertaining to have a head to head run off between count binface and Farage. I think if CB were to stand on a simple platform of making Clactons bins and bin collections the best in Britain and then vow to stand down, once his mission for Clacton’s bins was achieved, I’d vote for him.
Volodymyr Zelenskyy has shown what a comedian can achieve in politics.
Paul
Farage or Binface? Binface would get my vote to deny Farage a seat in Parliament.
This morning I watched a small segment of Sky News, and yes I know, Sky News, where they interviewed a couple of people in Clacton-on-Sea, and if their views are representative of the electorate in that area, then Farage is going to win, easily. If that turns out be correct, then it seems you can fool most of the people. most of the time.
I’m going to be somewhat controversial and say a few things that might make some – including our host who is still recovering from an illness (major guilt trip coming) – rather upset….
My view is that those of us who do not vote because we refuse to take part in a big lie should be turned into a political movement. A very loud political movement for real democracy. If I had my time again that is what I would do. Turn non involvement into a cause and whittle down the vote as, much as possible to undermine the fake democracy/real plutocracy we live under.
I ask myself continuously why people vote for shits like Farage, Johnson, Cameron etc., and one of the answers must be is that they feel that they have to vote out of a sense of duty or obligation based on the fact that we are expected to take part – voting is some sort of ‘gift’ that cannot be refused or questioned. This atavistic feeling of obligation negates any sense of the bullshit reality of how our democracy really is. The feeling of obligation or duty overrides our natural scepticism or repulsion as to who we are voting for. And we are also told ‘use the right to vote or lose it’.
I’m sorry but look at what is happening in front of you. You’ve already lost the right to vote because you have been priced out/ outbid on it haven’t you? Behind your backs. Yes!
I have affordable houses to deliver – I’m bringing in 30 this summer when the captured state has done its best to even stop that. Non participation in mass fraud called ‘democracy’ needs to be seriously considered, I kid you not.
By definition non-involvement is not democratic, IMO.
I just don’t get it
I’d call it a masive waste of time.
Sprry PSR, but you will never convince me of the merit of this idea.
I hate to sound flippant, but having convinced myself, I am not really interested in convincing anyone else in this matter?
Your right
I was just saying…
Bloody hell PSR, not this again!
You can choose not to vote, of course, but there is no way you can dress it up as democratic participation (however faulty our democracy may be).
A couple of other points:
1 – you can participate and refuse to vote for anyone. Spoil your ballot. If everyone who didn’t vote spoilt their ballot, the message of “none of these plonkers” would be heard loud and clear. But because the thinking non-voter seems to believe themselves enlightened (rather than just disengaged), this will never happen. “I’m not interacting with this sham until it gets better!” Ok. Well you’ll be waiting a bloody long time and I’m not sure how much of a leg you have to stand on when complaining about political issues.
2 – universal suffrage isn’t a natural right. There’s not a lot I get seriously wound up about, but being flippant about the right to vote is one of the few topics that does make me angry.
I’ll finish by saying that I agree with an awful lot of what you post here, and largely respect your views because of your comments. But, I would seriously urge you to reconsider this particular stance. It sounds like you convinced yourself that voting is pointless a long time ago – perhaps it’s time to reevaluate? (And, you know, be the change you wish to see in the world – bring all the non voters along with you to spoil their ballots and watch the establishment shit themselves)
@PSR
First I must applaud you for being involved in the creation of affordable hosing in spite of the government rather than because of it.
May I suggest that the mass movement of deliberate non-voters you want to unite as a single force should direct their combined resources to encouraging and supporting electoral candidates who you DO want to vote for? Whether Jeremy Corbyn and his new party are the way forward I cannot say but allowing the extreme minority a free hand to elect their own candidates to parliament isn’t the answer.
I appreciate the comments but my piece was a reflective one wasn’t it – I already have job/role doing something worthwhile. But riffing on the (not to be alternatives), I think that these days with the right sort of mobilization and financial backing, you can make a cause out of anything objectionable – I mean look at Farage, Restore Britain and the God-damned Tory party. What they have in common is capture by vested interests that essentially usurp democracy. Voting is supposed to be the communion between those seeking power and those who grant it. Now it is just a pointless ceremony – data centres and private utilities look set to remain. If voting for a parody such as Binface is your way of coping, so be it. But is Binface any better than Farage at managing the country? What does it solve? Nothing! Let’s keep the art of parody in the newspapers eh?
Spoiling ballot papers? Yes – why not? Happy with that too – a combination perhaps for political repudiators everywhere. But who seeks to organise the repudiators? We are living in a time of anythings goes aren’t we – outrageous claims can be made for a cause. Why not add another stream and see if it takes?
Fundamentally voters agree in this country that something is wrong.  The big problem is making a consensual majority out of the causes to bring change. The causes are superbly documented here. But racists, nationalists and bigots are the ones benefiting. And I and others want nothing to do with that. I think it too early to discount the seriousness of my proposition. You might think that there are still ‘rules’ here? Sad to relate, I don’t see any rules, anymore at all.
This is where we differ.
I believe in society. You seem to have given up on it.
Is that fair?
I’m still a voter, but PSR has a point.
1. The only time I ever spoiled my vote was when Police & Crime Commissioners were foisted on us. The turnout was spectacularly low but we got them anyway. That was a signficant downturn for UK democracy.
2. “Democratic” nations are on a spectrum with the regular 99+% votes for vicious tyrants like Kim Jong Un and Lukashenko at one end, and many other nations, including the UK, heading gradually (but acelerating) in that direction. Somewhere on that spectrum, people may (at risk to their liberty in some cases) choose to opt out. I haven’t got there yet, but PSR has. That’s a difference of opinion which I’m comfortable with, in our current imperfect system. He hasn’t opted out of making the world a better place (affordable homes).
My preference would be for a law, simultaneously making voting:
– compulsory
– easy/accessible for everyone on the franchise.
– with a “none of the above” (NOTA)Â option, to be included in all the anouncements and archives of results. If NOTA>50%, the election is void?
Our current system is failing. Participation is falling. I refuse to blame the electorate.
Very generous of you RobertJ.
When one repudiates something, you are rejecting it. I think that in the discourse on voting this gets overlooked, because as I have said, the concern is with…..I don’t know……philosophical hygiene issues with the ‘right’ to vote etc? When you reject something it is an act revolution to be honest – especially but not exclusive to politics? It is a statement as valid as any other in my view. And it is a stain, a signifier that something is wrong, as much as many of us here feel about the lurch to the Right and Fascism.
Look, I don’t have the answers for everyone, but I know that this is the right answer for me – including spoiling a ballot paper (I did it in 2003, and the election after). But there is a huge void growing isn’t their between the corrupt system that governs us and the reality of peoples lives. At the moment, that void is being filled with pure evil instead of justified outrage.
Voters need to withdraw their consent; they need to go on strike en masse, not turn up or spoil their papers whatever is the most effective way and deliver their verdict. That message needs some sort of co-ordination – not from here BTW, but in some form or other.
But you have rejected democracy.
What do you want instead?
No one changes the world by being in perpetual opposition.
Eventually, as I keep saying here, you have to be for something.
A couple of other examples:
A Bantustan election in white-ruled South Africa? If you are black – vote or boycott?
Bangladesh 2014 and 2024 – vote or boycott?
Russia presidential 2018 – call for boycott by Navalny (later assassinated). Vote or boycott?
Is this a spectrum thing or an absolute thing?
We are not the only ones thinking about this.
https://www.uu.se/en/department/peace-and-conflict-research/research/research-projects/opting-out-explaining-the-effectiveness-of-election-boycotts
Respectfully- my dad didn’t fight the Nazis, so I could be told I shouldn’t ever boycott a corrupted failed electoral system.
I’m still voting, but I’m closer to boycotting than I used to be.
I can only answer your questions here Richard.
Firstly, you cannot surely expect to base the concept of society within the act of voting alone? All I am doing is noting my disdain for one part of being in society – the act of voting, which for me is now an a non-act. I am a member of society – doing something that helps others, paying my taxes when due, even taking public transport and using my bike to reduce my carbon footprint in some hope that it makes some difference, volunteering to raise money here and there etc. Blah blah.
Secondly, I have not ‘rejected democracy’. I want democracy and we do not have it even though it is named as such. I struggle with democracy as it has not served us well of late – I look at its weaknesses (which are based in liberalism) and think it should be more robust for all our sakes. But that is not rejection of democracy as much as your rejection of Neo-liberalism is not a rejection of economics (as in we could have better economic thinking).
Voting has become an act of political decoy. Why not just be (painfully) honest about it? New ideas might flow.
There is an awful lot of hard wired effluvia about voting, sacred lambs etc. What I am saying is that their are opportunities that have yet to be grasped to bring about change. These may not be to everyone’s taste but may well have to be considered and utilized creatively . That is my position, a source of my hope if you like. That is the ground I stand on and will not yield easily to anyone, since hope, it is. Best wishes of course. Seriously.
Thanks to Andrew for the link to Binface’s page. A worthy use of ÂŁ25. I think he’d make a far better MP than the racist conman, liar, and grifter Farage. If he wins, wonderful. If not, what ‘victory’ will Farage have achieved? And straight back to face the music from the Parliamentary enquiry.
I love to see bullies like Farage crumble under the scrutiny he should have got years ago. And well done all the other parties for refusing to fall for Farage’s games.
I don’t know, surprising people have been known to rise to unexpected challenges.
Zelenskyy’s done quite admirably for a comedian.
If people honestly voted for ReformUK as a protest vote against “business as usual” (rather than their policies) then Binface should now be their obvious choice.
Is Count Binface any less qualified than a human rights lawyer who though it was ok for Israel to cutoff electricity and water to Gaza or who thought it was appropriate to give Mandelson the US ambassador position?
I am very sceptical of the Uniparty’s and LibDems motives here. There has been a lot of discussion about how these mainstream political parties have been doing their best to support the rise of fascism in the UK. How come they and the MSM are now turning against Farage if not to support fascism’s rise in some other more reliable ways?
I agree that Count Binface, if elected, would demonstrate to the electors of Clacton what an absolute fraud Farage has been as an MP but far better would be for him to be denied his resignation and to just have to carry on being investigated, albeit that he would be able to turn it into a new victimisation scenario.
The by-election slogan writes itself … “Take out the Trash ! Vote Binface !”
I like it!
Hmm…. so a bit off topic but Zelensky is mentioned here quite often.
And he did really achieve interesting things like a digitization in Ukraine and a rebuild program for houses and roads.
But he also is supposed to be not very efficient with anti-corruption and lost quite some approval before the invasion in 2022.
Also him seemingly allowing enforced conscription as well as preventing men to flee from war which is their absolute right to do…..
He’s not the very best example imo because being a president in war is very different from being a president in peacetime.
I wonder what PSR and you, Richard, think about people like me who spoil their voting papers? (I write ‘PR please ‘). I am not disengaging, because I believe spoiled papers are counted. But I refuse to vote for the useless candidates and policies on offer.
Better than not voting, IMO
A valid choice.
we discussed compulsory voting and PR on this forum a few weeks ago. The problem is how to get people into parliament under the current system who will then bring such changes into force.
A former boss once told me in an annual interview “You keep bringing me problems, I want you to bring me solutions”. Sadly I’ve failed again!
If I were in Clacton and has the choice between Farage and Binface I would unhesitatingly vote Binface. I would enjoy a laugh if Binface won. Ideally given how farcical this particular by-election is I would like to see Binface win with a tally of 16,472 votes, leaving Farage standing at the back looking stupid.
Agreed
Apparently Laurence Fox has said he’s standing.
73 votes then
Count Binface was brilliant on BBC this morning and the comments are priceless.
I would definitely vote for him if I could.
https://youtu.be/aGOmzQbRT_E?si=LLld3IMQs7A0YItd
I had to look up this Count Binface and oh my, I haven’t had such a good laugh in a while. So, thank you, Prof. Murphy.
If the Count puts half as much effort into being an MP as he put into making his costume, I think he is definitely worth a vote!
🙂
In the bin!
I would vote the same as I did in the 2024 GE. That is to remove someone/party not necessarily for someone.
Ironically, in what looks like becoming essentially a two-horse race with Farage, Count Binface could well be seen as the anti-establishment candidate or the “none of the above” choice.
As the Clacton by-election gets closer, the more Farage’s activists try to ensure that Count Binface is roundly defeated, the more Count Binface’s profile is raised in Clacton, the greater the risk for Farage that people will turn out to vote for the Count. After all 53.8% of the votes cast in Clacton 2024 were not for Farage. Â Turnout was 58.7%. If he wins then a reduced majority over Count Binface will look very poor for Farage.
I think voting is something everyone should do without fear of intimidation or reprisal, and as I have suggested on this blog before, it should be illegal not to vote, although every ballot paper would include a “None of the Above” option.
Had Nazi Germany won the Second World War, it is highly unlikely that UK citizens would have retained the right to vote in the form we enjoy today. Millions of people suffered and died to defeat fascism and preserve not only our democracy but those of many other countries.
For me, choosing not to vote is disrespectful to the people who gave their lives so that we could enjoy the democratic freedoms we have today, however imperfect they may be.
If such a situation was to occur in the constituency I live in then, absolutely, I would vote for the mighty Binface.
Craig
P.S. What is the standard of living like on Sigma 9
I gather it’s truly out of this world. In the unlikely event the Count loses and decides to return to Sigma 9 for some R & R maybe he could take Elon Musk with him and drop him off at Mars and save us all a whole lot of bother.
🙂
Clacton voters have a clear choice:
Vote for a fool, who knows nothing about politics, is only in it for himself, and who doesn’t care about Clacton.
Or vote for Binface.
Count Binface is a better person than Nigel Farage. I’d vote for him.