This is from Lloyds Banking Group’s half year statement:
The number the press has talked about is a loss of £4 bn (well, £3.957 bn, but that will do).
But did Lloyds actually lose this?
Or did it lose £7.785 bn?
Or did it make a profit of £5.95 bn as the auditors would have said?
After tax even a profit of £7.153 bn?
That’s a range of almost £15 bn.
And the farce that is modern accounting is revealed.
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There are far too many anoraks engaged in technical accounting smoke and mirrors, whose sole contribution to the good of mankind so far as I can see is to justify their own salaries. I had the misfortune to come across some of them while training. Can anyone spot the similarity between the ethos of a technical accounting specialist and Humpty Dumpty?
“when I use a word, it means exactly what I want it to mean”
“when I declare a profit, it is worth exactly what I want”
These people need to be reminded that they are not trying to put a manned space craft in orbit round Jupiter – their only purpose is to enable BEANS TO BE COUNTED – ACCURATELY.
….and what does “fair value unwind” mean for God’s sake?
Whoever is responsible for this rubbish needs taking out and shooting – metaphorically of course.